Someone who is newly free after a break up can be vulnerable to jumping into a rebound relationship with a new boyfriend or girlfriend. When a long-term relationship ends, it can leave a huge emotional gap that aches to be filled. If you’re still licking your wounds from the prior relationship, you may not be in the best emotional state to begin a new intimate relationship. A rebound relationship is often impacted by emotions that haven’t settled and the pain of the recent breakup. This could lead you to rush into things you may regret later.
Jumping into into a relationship too soon after a breakup could end up hurting both new partners. If you are still obsessed by your old lover and thinking about him or her instead of paying attention to your new partner, this could be a red flag that you’re still on the rebound. Feelings of hurt and anger after a breakup is normal, but if you’re still fixating on them when you’re alone, you’re on the rebound.
What if you’re dating someone who is on the rebound? If you’re seeing someone who is distracted by an ex, perhaps they jumped into this relationship with you too soon. Look for warning signs the same way you would for yourself. How long has it been since they were in a serious relationship? Are they clinging to items from their ex? Do they mention their old flame a little too often? Talking about your past is normal. Being obsessive about it can be a red flag.
Be honest to yourself about your reasons for entering into this new relationship. Are you dating simply because you’re terrified of being alone? Because you want to make your old love jealous? For revenge? None of these are healthy ways to begin a relationship. Ask yourself if this new flame is someone you’d still want to spend time with if you were not still licking old wounds.
Even if you are on the rebound, it may not be necessary to relinquish your new fling entirely. Things could turn out just fine, and the new partner could very well be the love you’d been looking for. Express openly your concerns to your new girlfriend or boyfriend and take things a little bit slower until both of you are sure that you’re using your best judgment and entering this with the right intentions.
The transition from an old relationship to a new one can be an extremely emotionally charged time in your life. Bringing a new person too close when you’re in a vulnerable emotional state can cause problems for both of you. So take things slowly when you’re starting up with someone new you and be honest about your motivations for dating them.